The Octagon Society
Your Second Free
Lesson
The Law of Shame
To the extent that we blame ourselves for anything, we feel ashamed. The
truth is that no matter what we've done, the Divine accepts, forgives and loves
us unconditionally. Mistakes are just that. We made an error.
It may have been an error in judgment, but we made an error. That's all we
did. We goofed. We made a mistake. We were wrong.
Then.
Whatever we did and whenever
we did it is over and we need to get on with our lives. We need to realize
that everybody living now and everybody that ever lived made mistakes and a lot
of those mistakes are far worse than anything we ever did. We need to get
over it and get on withour lives. Correct the error to the best of
your ability, accept that's the best you can do, forgive yourself for making the
mistake in the first place, love yourself in spite of this mistake and get on
with your life.
When you're ashamed, you're
not living your life and that's a much bigger mistake than anything you ever did
that makes you feel ashamed now. Get over it. Confess to yourself
and another human being whom you trust or confess to yourself and confess to the
Divine. Confess your mistake. Confess your inability to make it
right. Correct the error as best you can, accept this as being the best
you can do, forgive yourself, love yourself in spite of this error and get on
with your life.
If you don't, you're going to
wallow around in shame until you do. While you're wallowing around in
shame like a pig in a mud hole, life goes on and passes you by. You
remain in your dungeon of shame and people can't see the best in you. They
see only the worst and you continue your downward journey into self-pity,
self-judgment and self-condemnation.
What's wrong with this
picture? Other people who've done much worse things than you accept their
mistakes, forgive themselves and get on with their lives. Why can't you?
You can. Here's one way:
MANAGING SHAME - METHOD ONE
Make a list of
all the things you did in your life that make you feel ashamed now. Make a
list of all the things about your family, job, friends and environment that make
you feel ashamed. Then one by one take up each item and ask yourself the
following questions about that item:
-
Does the Divine, who accepts
and forgives everything, accept you and forgive you in spite of this mistake?
Keeping asking until you find the strength to say yes.
-
What can you do, in your
present circumstances, to make amends for this mistake? Make it a
priority to do what you can to make amends and avoid making this same mistake
in the future. Do what you can, accept this is the best you can do,
forgive yourself and love yourself anyway.
-
If there's nothing you can
do, for whatever reason, about making amends, turn to the Divine and ask for
forgiveness and peace and vow to do something to make somebody else's life
easier. By easing the pain of another person, you release your own pain
and shame.
-
Release your shame and let
it go.
If you feel ashamed about
something, you're holding yourself back in life and impeding your spiritual
growth. If you seek acceptance, forgiveness and love from the Divine
because of this situation, you will instantly receive it. If you accept,
forgive and love yourself to the best of your ability over this situation, you
empower yourself and you grow spiritually.
The choice is yours and yours
alone.
MANAGING SHAME - METHOD TWO
Make a list of
all the things you did in your life that make you feel ashamed now. Make a
list of all the things about your family, job, friends and environment that make
you feel ashamed. Then one by one take up each item and ask yourself the
following questions about that item:
-
What can I do to make amends
for the wrong that I've done?
-
Can I make restitution to
the person I harmed or their family?
-
What restitution can I make?
-
Can I help other people
instead to make this restitution?
-
What people?
-
What can I do to help these
other people?
-
What do I have to do to stop
feeling ashamed about this?
Your spiritual growth and your
ability to live life to its fullest depends upon your ability to resolve your
issues of shame. As long as you insist upon hanging onto your shame, your
shame will retard your spiritual growth. As long as you insist upon
hanging onto your shame, your shame will weigh you down and make life ever so
much more difficult for you. As long as you insist upon hanging onto your
shame, you cannot reach your highest potential in this life.
You must resolve your issues
around shame to become free. Spiritual Alchemy is one tool to help you
become free of the past so you can improve the quality of your life beyond
your wildest dreams.
Third Free
Lesson
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